March 30, 2009

Room of Solitude


The majestic rain towering again
Pouring down it's sadness down from heaven
I wonder why the heaven cry
Is it because he wants to stop my lonely sigh?

Pour down, pour gently, pour softly heavy rain
But please be sure that ditches are well plained.

Come pour down unto me so I can hide
That my tears are flowing down, pains haden't subside.
Come pour unto me and let them not see
That the water that flows down is not from you but from me.

Let them think I'm happy though pains inside
Let them admire my smile the loneliness I hide
Let them hug me and share problems that they have
Don't let them know my hearts breaking, breaking inside.

Let me say I am strong do cover me from storm
Let me smile while I cry, a smile of alibi
Let them draw their strenght to me
Though I'm about to stumble and fall

Rain do pour, do cover my solitude.

Subside...


The sky is dark so is my heart
The breeze is cold it is so odd
The pain is soothing deep within
Now that your gone I'm not the same

It needs time to heal the wound
'Coz my heart's been broken half is gone.
I need to reflect make it whole
For half is gone and half my soul.

You don't need to worry and don't need to be sorry
For this is the end of our sweet, sweet story
But I'll forever keep the mem'ry we'd made
To reminisce those days creeps a smile on my face.

Yes, sometimes so sad when you chose to let go
Even though you know that your heart does love so
But somehow, only somehow it is better to hold not
For love is not a game and even pain has its own feeling.

I may be wrong or could be you
But my heart's been wounded from the first day and so
I tried to mend it but you keep on making me weak
Doing things I'm not over yet, you smashed it on my face.

Do go on, let's go on
For we both have our own lives to live we'll do our best
If you think I'm wrong, I'm sorry
But though forgive me ain't a song of my melody.

I'm still trying to move on and trying to be strong
For this wind that blew me now, or, let's say a storm
Is stronger than typhoon who ends my pasts forms
This is more stronger how will I recover?

But yah, no worries though its a question truly is
But I'm known as a survivor and strong
And mending my broken heart may be labelled by storm
But I still have it's half and I know I can go on.

So, I'll let go of my cry
I'll let go all of my sigh
For my pillow is here listening and wiping my tear
This is our end but my new beginning

My heart's still bleeding
My tears still flowing
But though that I am feeling
I know 1 day it will subside again...

My Song For Tonight ( Roxette )

It must have been love, but it's over now

Lay a whisper on my pillow
Leave the winter on the ground
I wake up lonely, there's air of silence
In the bedroom and all around

Touch me now, I close my eyes
And dream away

It must have been love but it's over now
It must have been good but I lost it somehow
It must have been love but it's over now
From the moment we touched till the time had run out

Make believing we're together
That I'm sheltered by your heart
But in and outside, I turned to water
Like a teardrop in your palm
And it's a hard winter's dayI dream away

It must have been love but it's over now
It must have been good but I lost it somehow
It must have been love but it's over now
From the moment we touched till the time had run out

Yeah, it must have been love but it's over now
It was all that I wanted, now, I'm living without
It must have been love but it's over now
It's where the water flows, it's where the wind blows

It must have been love but it's over now
It must have been love but it's over now

Mom, be here once again...

The day of forlornness I can still feel
Seeing back again the memory that hurts so real.
You left us with our crying eyes
Tears are trickling down our lonely sighs...

My mom, be here once more
For we all missed you our hearts are sores
My father and me the two of my brothers
We all want to be with you do ease our tears.

4 years had gone so wild
To our sudden lives your not in our side
How we all wish to bring you back alive
And we'll all be living happy with smile and jive.

My mom, let me embrace you my gentle coat
For you maybe feeling, feeling cold
My mom, let me make you smile
For you may be so sad for how a while.

My mom, let me whisper you "I love you"
Do listen to my sorrow...
My cries are floating in the midway sky
Wishing you'll hear it do make me smile.

My mom, listen to me gently
You will always and forever remain in our memory,
My mom, do rest safely
For we'll be together again one day...

I have cried a million tears
When you left us full of fears
But though we know it was for better
Still we can't stop we did suffer.

My mom, even for a night
when all our eyes are shut behind close doors
Do visit us even in our dreams
So we can be together... be here once again...

March 29, 2009

Little Creature

Little creature, come, run hide
For you may be eaten, crashed and died.
Too little, too tiny indeed but still have life
Sneak out slowly from your hiding place at night.

Little are they who valued your worth
For they see you through off spring fold
Never care, never noticed, never wonder
If your a cricket a bug or whatever.

For some, insects are just insect
Transparent, see through and unwanted
But for some who needs your service
Your an angel that heaven had sent.

Work slowly and carefully little one
For the giants might arrived.
They'll stump, they'll clasped, they'll make you run
But be careful their hearts are gone.

Some would carelessly take a glance
Some would look at you but not beyond.
You too have life and do take care
Left and right so you do stare.

Go on with your life though strive and hide
Be careful and show your might.
In trouble though chirp for help
But yet be strong and show your strenght...

My little one take care.
For in mother nature your dearly dear.
Indulge your beauty to those who can't see
And let them see it even me...

Be home once again

I, that hath flown to distant land
Across valleys and accross thy o'ers
Here though suffering from aboad
But to my family that hath, I endured...
To thee that I have been carried
All the sufferings, loneliness to thy I loved
But though this tears hath worth thy while
For I see in their faces pretty smile...
To thy that I have loved,
My family is always in my heart.
Am I, yet far too sudden
But in my heart my beloved are well kept hidden.
For my treasure are thy happiness
To give them everything thy wanted.
To see their happy faces
With love, with hope, with guidance with courage.
I, have flown this far...
Not seeing you from a long, long while.
But my love always keep in mind
That your happiness is what I have ever wanted.
One day, one day in God's will...
I knew I can touch your faces pretty well
Flesh and flooding thoughts and laughter
That will of course fill our room with joyous tear.
I know one day, one day, we'll all be together
Loving, sharing, caressing each other.
Thy love for me I have kept,
In my heart it is locked and sealed.
For I long to see your happy faces once again
Thy God's will I know it will.
Thee that hath I love take care,
For I'm in distant land but have no fear
For God above keeps me away from danger
But gives me comfort makes me stronger.
I am away yet my heart hath stay
For thou I shall comeback thee wait for me.
Thou to God though seek and pray for safety
Have no doubt, have no worry
For I'll be home, be home someday
To my ever beloved loving family...

March 27, 2009

Another day

I woke up this day, another day.
I opened my eyes new paradise.
I think of days that passed and thanked for it.
For I'm still blessed that a new day had arrived.

Staring at the meadow nearby a butterfly flew
What a nice sight of view a flower show
A wind blew smoothly, making it dance
What a wonderful day! bright and sunny.

Clouds seems dancing up above the sky
Oh, how I wish I have wings so I can just fly
Flying with the birds dancing in the sky
Racing through their highway, up, up and fly!

World is just awesome! truly indeed.
World full of wonders, has it's own universe.
Different kind of creatures, adorable indeed.
Come on let's wander the wonders of this given universe!!!

Let's fly, let's float, let's dance.
Let's swim, let's sing lets hover and cover.
Let's walk,let's crawl, let's run and jump!
Let's clap, let's stop. let's listen and stump.

Hooray, hooray! universe bold and gay.
Swaying stories and history
Lullaby's on the bay.

Sunny sun glitters light
Twinkling beauty to our eye sight.
Sunny sun gives it's ray
Oh, my! come oh my! smile at me sweetly...

Never ending wonder,
Of this beautiful universe,
be thankful for the new day
For sometimes, sun won't give it's ray.

Be thankful, be happy of your new born day
Everyday is a new beginning
Of memory and new story
So seat back and relax enjoy the beauty embark.

Today is the new day
To be happy, to smile and be gay.

March 26, 2009

Tattoed in my mind

The day I met you was so unforgettable
The way you held my hand, so gentle...
I can never forget that smile in your face,
you smiled at me with passion and gladness...

I have felt how much I was loved by you
I appreciated it and I'm as well loving you so.
But everything really seems to have an end
and in my memory your floating, screaming my name...

I can't take you off my mind
I can't see a thing am I that blind?
I refused to see the paradise beyond
What's the reason of this sudden changed of mind?

But I....
still loving you...
In my mind,
Your tattoed...

But I...
still wanting you
In my dreams,
your tattoed...

But I...
still needing you
In my heart,
your tattoed...

But I...
still longing of you
In my life,
your tattoed...

But I...
still love you so,
I love you,
You're tattoed...

A right time

I heard the tickin' of the clock
And the beat of my heart...
Song keeps on playing
In my mind you are floating
My thought have been calling,
have been calling your name...
Tell me what's wrong to right
But I don't want to argue or fight.
Tell me I'm crazy nor insane
But there's always a right time and timing...
When I say I don't want to talk about it,
it means I don't...
Sometimes it's very important to wait
wait for the right time to talk...
Sometimes the best way to end an argument
is to walk away.
To avoid a fight, be careful, be softly, be gently...
There is a always a right time for everything,
a right time to argue
a right time to fight
a right time to listen
a right time to talk
a right time to walk
a right time to say sorry
a right time your not.
A right time to forgive
and a right time to be forgiven.
A right time to cry,
and a right time to smile.
There's always a right time.
A right time to compromise
A right time to emphasize
a right time to critisize
a right time for good bye's
a right time to step down
a right time to frown
a right time to gnaw
and a right time to let go...
Remember that there's always a right time.
And if I said I'll do,
it means I'll do.
But if you never believed it,
there's no use to continue.
You can let go,
'Coz I'm letting you go...

March 25, 2009

Let go or Continue...


The magic on my thoughts became real when I met you,

The magic had came true...


The fantasies I was fantasizing were revealed the moment I met you,

Fantasies had came true...


The wonders I wondered made real the moment I met you,

Wonders did came true...


The rolling thunders of kisses I felt in your kisses,

Thunders on my nerves...


Weak bone and chilling spine were your touches definition,

Your touch turns me on...


You kissed me and my blood's boiling with affection,

affection to go on...


Just go on...

Just go on...


But, wait! stop!

I don't need you to break my heart...


But, wait! stop!

We can end this, let's get part...


I don't need to feel the pain

And I don't want to cry again...


Even storms cries thru blowing wind,

Even thunder screams, beats and drumming,

Even lightning shows it's feeling

and cut tree trunks into dusting polluted thing...


What more me?

I'm vulnerable you see...


Even oceans trumpets a huge huge wave

the forlornness you can even felt...

Even rivers overflows to downstream of anger and gnaw...

And raindrops heavy creating a blow...


What more me?

I just loved you as I used to be...

Do you really need to hurt me?

Nope! cannot be...


I've too much of pain and enough of that...

Coz the snow is coming with it's warm gentle touch...

Wait for the hurricane to turn you around

And see the different view from here and beyond...


Let go if you feel like your feeling the pain again...

Let go if you're being trampled like "that" same.

Let go if you can't carry on the pain.

Let go if your heart's being broken...


But, wait! just wait...

Do remember that real happiness

comes and occurs in a very scarce period of time

and if you feel like he's your everything

and that he means the world to you,

Then don't be stupid to let go...


The decision is all up you.

Continue or let go...



Just let me cry...


Are you numb not to feel my pain...

Can't you feel that I'm in vain???



How dare you to ask me what's wrong!

How dare you break my heart so wrong!!!



I loved you and it was real and true...

But you don't deserve it... do you???



I was really happy being with you

And I even decided not to let you go...



I thought it was real

But your just someone who drives me ill.



I decided to live my life for you

To share you the world that I thought was true.



But what have you done???

You're making me cry ,

are those passions a lie

and gone with the lullaby of my cry ?



I am hurt.

Deeply hurt.

Wounded deep.



I'm in tear.

I've no fear.

Leave! I don't care.



I'd rather take the pain at a time

Than be buried by the pains all the time.



I'm not numb!

My heart feels pain.

My feeling gets hurt

and my heart feels it.



I'm not perfect

But I know when to show

and I know when not to.



I'm living my present but I know where to leave the past.

I'm dreaming you for my future

but not with those you have once adore!



You said you trust me,

But have you considered my feeling within?



You said it doesn't mean anything...

But have you tried to ask me if it's ok?



You want me to listen

But have you heard my heart screaming in pain???



I've decided to leave everything for you

But now, I don't know...



You told me I'm the present and the future,

but why drag back your past to the present

that's suppose to be ours?



Past must remain and stay in your past.

Put your past behind.

Leave the past where it belongs.

Where you can sing its songs.



I don't want your past to be in your present and in my presence.

I never asked to your past to be forgotten

but just let them stay where they are suppose to lay.



But now, where're our dream?

It's dying while I'm crying...



Now where are our plans?

It's almost gone...



Track this track of time...

For my feelings and love wouldn't be the same after my tear...



Try to stop the time

For it might not come back if I'll say

it's over and we're done...



Please let me cry...

Just let me cry this time...

My Piece of Anger

I wrote this piece several months ago in response to a message I received regarding a post of mine on another website.
To you who send me message that I COPIED A WORK
YOU ARE JUST JEALOUS!!
'Coz I can write better than you!
To you who assumes 'TIS ISN'T MY WORK

DAMN! You can't just write a literary the way that I do!

I am me and you are you
You can not be me and I will never be you!

'Coz I am SMART and YOU is DOLT
'Coz I am GOOD
and YOU are ODD

'TIS PIECE IS FOR YOU!

Go on, read and envy
For after you read this,you'll regret and feel dismay

Because I have the GUTS to share what I feel.
I have the GUTS to show what is real.
I have the GUTS to say this is ME,
And expresses it all in a piece of a letter
THE YOU WHO IS SO JEALOUS!!!
'Come on' take a glimpse, even stare,read and study my work
'TIS PIECE IS MADE ONLY FOR YOU
So you'll know that the hand and mind who works is ME and MINE

and not a SO DAMN YOU!

Explore, wander the work transforms into letter

TO YOU WHO SAYS I CANNOT WRITE,
TO YOU WHO SAYS "DELETE ALL YOUR BLOGS"
This is the other side of me...
I'm sorry but...
DAMN YOU!

You have no right to drag me down
You can not be the one who'll turn me out
From writing which is a part of my life!
Through this I can reveal
The feeling I have which is so real

And you who says I can't
I'm challenging you face to face let's write!

Exert an effort from your own
So you'll know the feeling, how's it to be judged
by the piece of work on your own.

GOT IT???!!!!!

I want...

I want to see you when your sleeping
I want to see you in all and every morning
I want to see and hear you laughing
I want to see you when your crying.

I want to be with you in everything that you do
I wanna be with you 'til the end of all tomorrow
I wanna be with you when you need me
I wanna be with you 'til our hair turns gray.

I want to take care of you when you don't feel well
When your head is aching or you're having some pain
When there's thing you can't do, I'll do it for you
You can rest while I'll massage my love and caress to you...

I want to be with you when I want to cry
When I feel in vain nor in sorrow or in pain
I want to share with you the life that I have
I want to love you 'til my heartbeat stops.

I want to share with you the happiness and pain
When I'm laughing or even when I'm crying
When I am writing or I'm reading, even when I'm cooking
dancing or singing.
I want to share with you everything---

Things might be exasperatingly insane
But that's the reality of my feeling...
I want you---I need you
I need you and I want you---
Just simply because I love you and I love you so...

March 24, 2009

Good bye

When the time has come
You've got to be strong.
You got to live on.
See that distant light?
It's shining so bright.
It will show you the way.

'Coz the world is for you my dear.
You can make it I know you will.

After saying goodbye,
Please don't ask me why.
When the love is gone,
True hearts are broken.
How can I help it?
My love's still alive.

As the day goes by
And the night closing in,
I can get no sleep,
I walk alone in the street.
I'm back on my feet,
It's breaking my heart I feel the heartache.

What went wrong

I'm here in my room alone
Thinking of you and what went wrong.
I have given everything you ever wanted,
I've gave you the attentions you needed.

What went wrong?
When all I did was love you...

What went wrong?
When I followed the every word you have told.

Did you come just to hurt me?
From the beginning, I have felt how much you have loved me..
Then all of a sudden you've changed
And told me to forget you then.

What went wrong?
When I keep on understanding your lies
Just to make all things work
But still not enough you complies.

Many questions unanswered
And many answers untold.
I don't know what I did to you,
For you to tell me to forget you.

Reminiscing


Reminiscing the day of good bye
The good bye that for a month or more a one will cry
That cry that made a life miserable
Miserableness that made a heart fell apart.

Fell is a part of loving
Loving that needs comfort and trust
Trust that should be given to a right person
Person who would love and be with you by all means.

Means love needs to be molded
Mold it to grow strong.
So when the wild wind blow, you're foundation is strong.
Strong foundation must be built from both of you.
You have to do everything and must fight for your love.

Love is a gift to feel and not a burden to carry
To carry is a challenge to overcome it's test.
A test that made a one happier after surviving it.
Surviving the challenge that will dare you to love again.

Again, give yourself a chance to mingle
Mingling to people whose in test, survived, who lose and who win.
Winning is an award after a very difficult struggle
Struggle to survive and aim to win it all.

All experiences that you will encounter and feel
May good or bad, take it to your heart.
Heart that beats and tell you to love
A love who will teach you to be happy and sad.

Sadness must be fought, happiness should occur.
Occurred to be happy and accept the consequences.
Consequences corresponds to every challenge you meet
To met is a quiz.
So answer wisely that no good bye's to reminisce...

It couldn't be done

If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't;
If youd like to win, but you think you can't,
It's almost a cinch you won't;
If you think you'll lose, you've lost;
For out in the world you'll find
Success begins with a fellow's will -
It's all in the state of mind.

Full many a race is lost
Ere even a race is run,
A many a coward fails
Ere even his work's begun.
Think a big, and your deeds will grow,
Think small and you fall behind,
Think that you can, and you will;
It's all in the state of mind.

If you think you are outclassed, you are;
You've got to think high to rise;
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.
Life's battle doesn't always go
To the stronger or fasten man;
But sooner or later, the man who wins
Is the fellow who thinks he can.

Death is a Gift

My voice is trembling, my eyes are in tear.
Alone in my dim room, never felt any fear.
I've questioned God, I'm full of anger.
Why did he take you so early my dear...

Why did He gave you to me?
When after a day you'll be just a memory.
God, why is it you took him away?
Why didn't you just let him stay by me?

Why does my test full of sorrows and pains
Why are my angers burst out again
What is the message you wanted to tell
Why won't you take me instead to finish thy thrill.

Then I fell asleep still my eyes are in tear
I dreamth of an angel singing lullabies to my ear
Someone had spoken touching my heart with care
Then all of my anger vanished that made me more stronger.

Now I understand why He gave me it all
Because He loves me so and He wants me to call
To call thy His name ' coz I've forgot him before
I am his child and that he loves me so sure!

I come to realize that death is a gift
For thru death you'll be happy, eternal indeed.
No worries, no pains, no sorrows you would felt
'Coz in his kingdom you will dwell, eternally happy forever.

Glory and Honor

Birds are chirping,singing on their nest
Breeze so cold, feel its tenderness
Wind is blowing merging with the breeze
The sun is shining, wander its prettiness


Flowers are blooming, blossoms so sweet
Fruit trees are hanging, better to eat
A kid is marching towards the street
Here comes the dog follows his master carrying a stick.

See the river it flows so well
Look up to the sky a beauty you will sigh
Here is the sun's ray, I really did feel
A vitamin to your skin it's naturally real.

Now hear the echo of the jungle's king
It's roar is high to the air it swing
And chase the bee catch that thing
Enjoy the life what it may bring.

And here I am sitting in the garden
To be here I feel like I am in heaven.
How mighty the creator of all
He is the one to be given the glory and honor.

Seeking peace

So when would we realize the importance of peace?
- when it's too late?

Why people just can't work out peace
Bombings here, killings there, dead bodies laid down & bloods flown
In a one creator we are one, from his breathe he had blown
He that made us - What have we done?

The importance of life and living
Where is it now for us to cling
When killing are a habit to some of our bretheren

Why can't people just FORGIVE and not to take REVENGE
When the cycle of life - Is it really the range?

So sad to say that people killing people for power
People betraying people to give more cover
People begets people - such a user!
Why do people just can't love one to the other.

Why people do cheat just to get what she/he wanted
Why people do laugh when somebody is dead
Why people are in sarcassing tone to the one's who failed
Why people ignore the SCREAM of "PEACE"

Well, maybe simply because we are just people---
---and this is a sudden truth

"NO BODY IS PERFECT"

But we can be a better person and live a good life,
we can lessen the war and contributes peace
when your main reason
Is I'm a God fearing person.

Poem's Importance

The importance is not the rhyming,
But the message it bring.

The importance is not the "who write"
But when the poem comes from he/she's heart.

The importance is not the way of reading,
But it's the way of understanding.

The importance is not the comment that hath,
But that he/she had said what is "IN" he/she's heart.

The importance is not the grade he / she can get,
But the ability of writing he / she did.

The importance is not the snob of some readers,
But the joy we can give to others...

In You

In your eyes I see
True love eternal and free
Overflowing with hope and gladness
You put an end to my sadness.

In your presence I feel
Security that's so real
Keeping me away from harm
I found shelter in your arms.

In you I see
Somebody I long to be
A face so kind and gentle
And a touch so tender, so lovable.

In you I found
The love I am abound
Embracing me so tight
Putting the restless me to sleep at night.

It's you

It's you who made my life worth living for
It's you that i adore!

It's you who made me smile
No more tear can i cry...

It's you who hold my hand tight
and never let go against my fight

It's you who kissed all my pain
and you're my shelter from the rain

It's you who easses all my sorrow
I wish for no tomorrow

It's you who loves me so true
my ever beloved one...
I will love you 'till the end of time.

Being me


I am a girl a poet A wisher
I'm me...


I am a writer,a letter and a keeper.
I'm me...


I am a sender and a seeker of what's true
What's true of being me and being you
I am a fighter who fights for the truth and reasonable things
I am a listener to those who talks and even yells
I'm me...


I also am a woman who wants to be loved by who i am
And not to the one they want me to become.
Im me...


I'm just being me,
And not the ugly loser they used to say
One of these days infront of them i'll stand straight!
That 'tis loser they said is i am
Is an ugly duckling turning into swan.....

Price of Fame

You could have friends a few
Or everyone may know you
But popularity ain't a game
That's the price of fame.

Some feel guilty or paranoid
For their greatness may be void
One mistake you're brought to shame
That's the price of fame.

When you're famous you're exposed
They'll recognize you even with eyes closed
Hecklers and jokers will use your name
That's the price of fame.

Gossips and papers would destroy
They'd say your talents are just decoy
They'll say you're the one to blame
That's the price of fame.

But when you become a faliing star
When they forget who you are
What once was beautiful now is lame
That's the price of fame.

Only a few will analyze
And even fewer will realize
The hidden truth, we're all quite the same
Well, that's the game of fame.

Butterflies

Butterflies come in different colors,
From yellow to red, from white to blue,
They'll fly carelessly towards you,
The least time you expect them too.

Their wings flutter gracefully,
Amusing your weary days,
Their colors shining in the sun,
Takes your blues away.

And when you're dowm and lonely,
It rest atop your shoulder,
Its blue wings cooling your sad eyes;
Making you feel much better.

The moments you had together,
Will never ever be replaced,
Your love for it will never fade,
Treasured in the memories you made.

Butterflies guide as long the way,
Away from nasty thorns and weeds,
They support us as we grow and bloom,
They listen to our silent heeds.

And when you take it forgranted,
Or don't even bother or care,
You don't realize how much you'll regret,
To lose a butterfly so rare.

Sometimes we may not realize,
That they are blessing in disguise.
They'll make you smile when life's a mess,
Or when things go really tense.

All I can say is one things for sure,
They're our life, our joy, our cure,
They're supportive, caring and wise,
They are our priceless butterflies.

Love for Hire

If I ever say "WANTED BOYFRIEND"
Will they apply?

If I ever say "LOVE FOR HIRE"
Would they try?
If I ever say "I need someone"
You think they'll run?

If I ever say "I want to cry"
Would you wave good bye?
Yes, I'm in pain...
Yes, I'm in vain...
Yes, I am wounded deep...

You want to know why?
Hmp! don't try.

I just want to post a sign, if only I can
That love is for hire here in line.
But how can I do that when I've already gave my heart...?

Would you dare to try for my love for hire?
When the one I desire almost say good bye...
Because I made a stupid LIE
That makes him cry...

LOVE FOR HIRE!
Wanna try?

Pretending


Tears flow
my pillows are wet
I pretended my eyes just hurt.

My mind is floating
didn't hear what his talking
I pretended my head's just aching.

He whispered me softly
how much he have loved me
I closed my eyes - sleeping- pretending.

He made love at me
I faked a moan so he won't see that my eyes are
filled with tears of hunger and crave
to the one I truly loved and that one is not he...

He hugged me tight
I'm imagining that the hand that clasped mine
is not he's but to the one that I have loved...

But how can I break it to him?
How can I stop pretending when I know the feeling
of getting hurt and how hard is it in pain.
how can I stop pretending?

The music and lyric

You can't feel my heart sobbing
you can't my hear my voice trembling
I'm in pain...
I turned on the music...

"I wish you were here to hold me tight
to say you love me and kiss me good night"
says the lyric...

A tear began to fall
I feel you-not-at-all!
I missed you a lot, I love you-my all...

"How can I make these dreams real,
when falling stars nothing fell.
Genie in a bottle or God mother
Oh, good fairy cast a spell"
The music continues...

How can I tell him all of these
when I don't deserve him truly is.
I have done unlikely things
and his sorrow I possess...

I wish you're here to hold me tight
to say you love me, kiss me good night
Take all my fears away
Kiss all my pain, melancholic melody...

Pour a glass of wine
Simply sipping somehow be fine
Escaped from the thought, can't get you off my mind.

Door went open I'm in fear
Though visions unclear you're standin' there
A bunch of flower for me you offer...

My tears fell how will it stop
When I have dreamin' you all my life.

Loud laughter woke me up
"The music's over DJ Clare's here"

The vision is clear,
you are not here...

I loved you

I loved you
when you turned away,
I loved you as you went astray
I loved you then, as I loved you now
I'll go on living without you...

But how?

Sheila Mae means

What Sheilamae Means
You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.
You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.
You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out.
Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia.
Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.
You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.
At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.
You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.
Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic “Type A” personality.

You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.
You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.
You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

Night Sky

The night sky lights on me her shining grace,
As tears slowly trickle down my face...
She sees all my sorrows, trouble and shame,
As I lay myself down, wounded by pain...

The night sky engulfs me with her blanket of stars,
Doing her best to mend all my scars...
She breathes upon me her cold, comforting air,
As I stare into the darkness, lost in despair...

The night sky shares with me her amazing history,
As I bare to her all the story of my misery...
She listens carefully to each word I say,
As I share a story of loneliness, love and dismay...

The night sky shows me the black clouds she passes,
Hoping that by doing so, my sadness she might suppress...
She sees that slowly, a smile creeps from my lips,
Though the pain from my wounds continuously seeps...

The dawn is coming, the night sky had to go,
She said goodbye, she just had to do so...
She did her best, and I know what I had to do,
As a new day comes, I had to move on too...

October rain

October rain rushes to my sky,
The end is near and I don't know why
Will you remind me to play someday?
To dance on the street with the falling rain?
Because fairy tales, yes fairy tales
They all mean the same to everyone else.
Just like the leaping fires of fate,
That took me before I wake.
To watch the october rain,
As it takes away my pain.

Could it be that the world is blind?
And all that glitters isn't all that fine.
But their eyes that see, must now sleep,
And wait when tomorrow's today,
And wait when tomorrow's today,
And it would all be okay.
Now the morning breeze,
Is flying by.
The end is near and I don't know why.

Did U ever?

Did you ever imagine how the wind blows
How the flowers bloom
And how the rainbow got it's hue?

Did you ever think how the sun shine
And why the moon is bright.
Do you even wonder how the bird was made
And how the earth was made?

Did you ever think about the importance of the raindrops
And the spark of shining stars above that brights

Why do the waterfalls, fall
And why volcanos explode with lava

Did you ever thank God for creating you and the whole universe
Did you ever thank God for giving us this world full of wonders

Did you ever try to asked yourself who comes first between the chicken and the egg
Did you ever plant a seed here in our earth

Did you ever love living things - God's creation indeed!
Do you pause to hear the chirping of the bird
Have you known the importance of the air you breathe
Did you ever thank God for the food you eat

Did you ever thank God for your whole-being
Did you ever thank him for giving you a friend
Did you ever thank him for the water you drink
Did you ever thank him for the creations he made

Did you ever wonder why fish live only to water
Did you adore the butterflies flying in the meadow
Did you ever imagine life without the air
Did you ever think what to drink when the water won't flow
Did you?
If so..
Take Care of our mother nature!

did you....?

Alone

I hear the tickin' of the clock
I'm lying here the room's pitch dark
I wonder where you are tonight
No answer on the telephone
And the night goes by so very slow
Oh, I hope that it won't end though
Alone

Till now I always got by on my own
I never really cared until I met you
And now it chills me to the bone
How do I get you alone?
How do I get you alone?

You don't know how long I have wanted
To touch your lips and hold you tight, oh
You don't know how long I have waited
And I was going to tell you tonight
But the secret is still my own
And my love for you is still unknown
alone

Ohh
Till now I always got by on my own
I never really cared until I met you
And now it chills me to the bone
How do I get you alone?
How do I get you alone?

How do I get you alone?
How do I get you alone?
Alone, alone

The past

She was too young to remember all the things she want to.
She was too innocent to suffer such sorrow.
She was too vulnerable to fight for her own,
Yet she sees life and face the challenges that occurs.

She was too young then and realize she's alone.
Nobody's around and no one to cling on.
She cried often times rememb'ring the family that vanished
In a blink of an eye, where are they, she's in need.

Broken vows was the one that makes her suffer more.
The longings of love where is it, she was craving for.
The hatred grows and the sorrow in her heart dwells,
How can she able to win when the game is not hers to win?

But then she stood still never stop fighting,
If the world is playing she must control the game.
She never give up, she never gives in,
though heart is broken she's ignoring all the pain.

'Til one day comes she felt the numbness of her heart.
It's used to all the pains she has control over feeling.
She swears to herself not to stumble or fall,
If so it would happen, she must take over control.

She had fought many fight
She'd learned to close her eyes,
To closed it for the wrongs and open it to the rights.
And fin'lly she realized God never left her side.
For God was always there win or lose the fight.

She found a new beginning, to leave the past behind.
To live for the present and open a wide hand.
To embrace the failures to acknowledge the fall.
To live in balance and not to ask for more.

She now have what she wanted
In her life she's contented.
The past that once was a nightmaire was a memory
she will always remember.

That past made her what she is now,
that past makes her strong.
That past she would neve allow,
To haunt her in lullabies of song.

Now she is still standing but not fighting again.
Now, she is still playing but never mind losing the game.
Now, she still have troubles but doesn't mind falling.
Now she can feel the pain but never care crying.

Now she, is she is as she wanted to be.
Now she, is she is who makes her own destiny.
Now she, is she is contented and happy.
Now she, is Mae, who loves unconditionally...

What is life?

Life is a GOal. Reach it.
Life is a Challenge. Meet it.
Life is a Dream. Realize it.
Life is a Game. Play it.
Life is an Oppurtunity. Grab it.
Life is a Mystery. Unfold it.
Life is a Puzzle. Solve it.
Life is a Song. Sing it.
Life is a Struggle. Accept it.
Life is a sacrifice. Offer it.
Life is a Sorrow. Overcome it.
Life is a Joy. Spread it.
Life is a Romance. Enjoy it.
Life is a Gamble. Take it.
Life is a Tragedy. Face it.
Life is a Bliss. Embrace it.
Life is a Promise. Fulfill it.
Life is a Battle. Fight it.
Life is a Journey. Complete it.
Life is God's gift. Cherish it.

Goodbye

Good bye's are usually hard and sad,
Sometimes it's easy
Some are simple some are simply bad.
But one thing of good bye I never thought really,
It's that good bye is also funny!

Good bye's I think are not literally the last
But temporary to someone, yes, it does.
Some good bye's are forever,
Some are promises to be back again.

Would you let good bye flow
To someone who has ability to bring out the funny side of you?

Would you like to stop,
when even a hundredth of good bye aren't even enough?

Woul you like to hold back,
when that good bye doesn't reeally meant to go
but wants to have you?

Good bye is just for now,
Be back lateer or soon somehow.
Waved good bye but meant to stay.
Said get up but doessn't stop.

Does good bye really meant to leave
or a beginning of a profound friendship?

If I am to ask you, what do you think?

Taking chances

Your smile brightens up my day
But I'm not sure if you believed me.

Your eyes are the twinkling star of my journey,
But I caught you, smiled so weary.

I long to have you but how?
I want to be with you, when if not now?

I met you accidentally
Though unintentionally it makes me happy
'Coz that mistake brought you to me
And gives glitter in my memory.

Will I ever see that smile in your face
and captivate the beauty it persist?

Questions of would you,
Questions of will you,
Questions of how can I
Or you would just let me pass by...?

I am taking chances
and the chance is nearly not.
Would I see you or see you not,
Would you come near or stay apart?

Am taking chances one of hundred,
even make it fifty not enough indeed!
But for you I'll take the risk
Even if the prize I may get
Is breaking my heart into pieces.

Though it's one of the possibilities,
One thing I can proudly say
Is that I try....
And all up to you
If you'll just let me pass you by...

The real smile on your face (hon)

I'm sorry because I don't have a power
to get back the love that you have given...

I'm sorry if you seem to feel the fear
'coz you have given everything and the only thing that's left is the pain...

I'm sorry 'coz I can't do anything to regain the love.
Please do remember that I'm always here ---
I am more than willing to listen, you have my love...
You can cry on my shoulder, we'll share the tear---

Shed over me all the fear---we'll share...
Tell me some of your pain---let me feel what your feeling...
Go on, just cry---I'll be here---go cry---just try...
I will listen... share to me some of your pain...

Tell me the sorrow that you're hiding,
together let's ease out all the pain...

Go on, you can tell me everything--- you don't need to pretend...

Remember that I love you, remember, I'm here,
remember that your safe with me, remember...
you can share with me all your misery...
remember I won't let you down---

The least I can do is to listen and love you so,
to tell you that I'm here---
and to remind you to remember
That I'm here, all of your pain I'm willing to share...

If world seems difficult
And anxiety's filling and haunting you,
I'm just here---let's talk it over
Let's cry and share the tear together...

Let's carry the pain 'til we reach the edge together.
We are still here --- I am still here---
I wish for your grand happiness
And I wish to see the real smile on your face...

I love you and always remember that I'm here...

Beyond forever

Beyond Forever
As long as my heart
still beats...

As far as my eyes
could see..
As long as I can breathe
and as long as I can smile...
As long as rainbow
has it's hue...
My love for you will remain true
And as long as that is I feel,
My heart and love is yours

Beyond forever

'Til then

When the birds can no longer fly,
And violets were the color of the sky,
That'll be the time that my love for you will die.

When the fish can no longer swim,
And branches never will swing,
Thats the time I will forget your name.

When rainbows don't anymore have hue,
When moon, sparkles with color blue,
That will be the time to forget about me and you.

When the sun won't shine anymore,
And no one will even recognize a color,
That'll be the time of forgetting the one I once adore.

When the wind anymore won't blow,
And rivers won't anymore flow,
That'll be the time I will let you go.

But as long as birds can fly,
and blue is the sky,
When fish still swims,
And branches still swing,
as long as the moon brings light,
And rainbows has its hue,
When the sun still shines,
and the wind still blow,
and as long as the rivers flow,
Everyday I'll always say I love you and I'll never let you go!